Today was a day that simply sucked. The past few months have been very up and down but never were at the level of today’s terribleness and I honestly don’t know what to do with myself after today. 

My life has always been a complicated one. I was born to a mother that couldn’t raise me, adopted by a grandmother on my dad’s side that frankly should have never been a mother, yet raised all my life from a baby to a family unrelated to me, but became the people who loved me and the ones I now call my God family, my true family. 

Over the past 18 years I have had more run-ins with my grandmother then I could count and I have never once had 10 minutes in her presence without her threatening or yelling at me. Our relationship was always nonexistent. I have lived with my God family all my life and have only ever visited my grandmother, but that’s never stopped her from finding ways to emotionally attack me. 

It sucks that I can’t say I’m suprised about what happened today. Supposedly someone stole the plates from my car but were caught and the police had the person arrested. The police took the plates to the station and my God family and I drove to go pick it up. Low and behold my grandmother was there (She had been calling and causing commotion all day) and she got in my God moms face yelled at her asked for the keys which my God mom gave to her and headed outside to where I was sitting in the car with my God dad reading a book. My grandmother (who also brought a long time friend with her and her friends children with her) proceeded to say she was going to take the car. When I got out of the car and she went in my face saying if I wasn’t going to speak to her for a minute, I choose not to anwer and my God family and I (my God mom and dad both elderly and my God sister) started a four hour journey to walk all the way home. (Even though my grandmother said she would drive us back there was no way we were not going to walk because if I went in that car there would be a yelling fest of the century and I was too angry to get in a car with someone that literally just took away the only car my God family and I had. (That would be like getting in the car with someone who just knifed you in the gut). 

Honestly, there is way way more to this story as it is also related to more then 18 years of being hurt by the same woman, but honestly I could write a book about my history and it would suck because this episode while the worst recently isn’t the worst of all time. 

I’m upset. I’m angry. I’m feeling emotionally drained and sad. I’m hurting and I fear that this is only the beginning of worse things. I generally try to post positivity on here, but this was such an insane thing that I needed to share or else risk emotional implosion. 

If you are religious your prayers are appreciated. If you are not your good will is also appreciated. However, the one thing I really need right now is happy thoughts. So send me a link to something that made you laugh or a picture of a cute animal or anything happy and animal related really. Knowing that I can still smile in the face of all this mess is a comfort to me and knowing that I’m smiling at something you have also smiled at is a true blessing and a comfort. 

Thank you all for taking the time to read this. I’m terribly sorry that this isn’t my usual positive Bookish post. I almost didn’t post anything at all, but I don’t think I could do that. This blog keeps me sane and your comments always make me smile. 

-Till next time.

48 thoughts on “Life Update: Today Was A Terrible Day

  1. Oh, Sweetheart, I feel your pain! I have been estranged from most of my family for a long time and when we HAVE to get together it is exceptionally difficult. I try to protect my daughter from it as much as possible but things like last week when there was a death in my family, actually my favourite Uncle, and we are forced together my daughter is very observant and has it pretty much sorted in her head. Hold your head up high darlin’ and don’t let your Grandmother see what she does to you because then she wins, or that’s my personal feelings anyways. Big hugs and I’ll keep you in my prayers xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. That’s terrible, and I’m sorry you had such an awful day 😦
    It’s weird, but I think videos of turtles eating are hilarious and they tend to make me smile, so I hope you enjoy this baby turtle trying to eat a strawberry!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for this blessing! God that turtle was adorable and hilarious. Thanks for the hugs and I hope to move forward as positively as I can. This definitely made me smile and I’m definitely going to watch more of these turtle videos in the future (or really right now XD)

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m sorry you have been going through so much for so long…I am religious and I do pray so I will definitely be lifting you up in my prayers tonight. Hoping for some clarity and peace soon!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you that is much appreciated and I’m hoping for things to start looking up in the near future. I honestly feel like I’ve been hit by a tornado, but all the support from everyone really helps me to feel like better things are on the horizon.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. That must suck for u… my grandmother can be really annoying sometimes and I always thought I had it worse… but she loves me and cares for me and for that I need to be grateful… I’m sure there are people who love you out there and who will treat you the way u r supposed to b treated… just don’t lose hope… things are going to get better…

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I might be a bit late but I’m currently sending you a virtual hug and promise to keep you in my prayers. You are always so happy in here and it sadness me to know that is not always the case in the real world. As cheesy as this may sound, everything has a way of sorting itself out. God never abandons his people and one day everything will truly be good. I wish you the very best in this situation!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Oh, Tiana. I’m so sorry you have had to deal with that. I know it’s not the same, but I also grew up with a less than sub-par parent in my life (I actually just posted about it last week). <–I'm not trying to change attention off you, but for me I sometimes like to know that there are other people who didn't grow up with Brady Bunch family types. It makes me feel less alone.

    I'm sending you prayers and good vibes for you and your God Family that this will all be resolved soon.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. It really is. I’m fiercely loyal so I have such a hard time understanding how family can treat one another that way. I know some people put up with it because “family” *eyeroll*, but IMO family should be treating you BETTER than anyone else. You shouldn’t be having to make excuses for their terribleness. I am glad you have a God Family that gives you the love and support you deserve though.

        Liked by 1 person

  7. This sounds like such an awful situation! Your god family sounds wonderful and it’s so awful of your grandmother to cause all of you such physical and emotional stress. 😦 I’m hoping the situation is better now! And you’re enjoying all the cat videos! 😉

    Liked by 1 person

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