Mental Health Book Tag

Yesterday while I was reading some others blog posts for the day I came upon this post from ‘My Book World’ called Mental Health Book Tag. My own mental health has been iffy lately. I’ve been angry and sad and incredibly anxious. My mind has been so on edge I’ve cried at work worrying about my dad and I’ve made little excuses about things that aren’t going to happen to be worrying to my boyfriend and I’ve felt like a mess. Life these days has felt so fragile and yet so precious and I’m keeping in my mind that my dad told me to think positive. So I will.

So today, I would like to share with you all my answers on this Mental Health Book Tag. I want to share some awesome books that don’t shy away from something that touches everyone’s lives at some point and in some way in one shape or form or another.

What’s a book or series that features a strong support system?

In ‘Spinning Silver’ Miryem’s parents are a strong support system not only for her, but for Wanda who comes to work for them. When Miryem is first taken to live with the Staryk king Wanda doesn’t know what to do, thinking she wouldn’t have a job anymore. However, Miryem’s parents step up and reassure her continuing having her help and even adding an extra job for her brother to keep them safe and afloat. They are always making sure Wanda is fed and that she has a safe place to be while making her feel like she’s doing something that gives her purpose. They are an amazing support system.

What’s a book, series, or genre that you turn to when you need to take care of yourself? What’s something that you do—other than reading—to take care of your mental health?

Magical realism books like ‘The Strange and Beautiful Sorrows of Ava Lavender’ make me feel so curious and fascinated. Magical realism strikes me. Reading these kind of books when my mental health isn’t doing well helps me to distract my mind. However, if I’m having a crisis I talk to my boyfriend or my friends. My boyfriend always listens and is kind and understanding to me about everything I’m going through. When I see him and stuff is still going through my mind he’ll just hold me and tell me everything will be ok. It means the world to me.

What’s a book that features a character that is relatable to your mental health or illness?

I have never felt more understood by a book before I read this one. Kiko’s relationship with her mom is almost the exact relationship I had with my grandmother. ‘Starfish’ was such a raw read for me. Narcissistic abuse is no joke.

What’s a book that depicts a bad representation of a mental difference or mental illness?

I read this book years ago before I really understood representation and really mental illness at all. However, looking back this isn’t a good representation of mental illness. Also, it glorifies mental illness. Which is why the book and tv show has been criticized many times by many people to shed light on its misrepresentation.

What’s a book that depicts a good representation of a mental difference or mental illness?

Speak ’ is a good representation of a girl dealing with the trauma of sexual assault. She is isolated by her peers to be on her own causing her to withdraw into her own mind. She has no support and her grades slip and the only place she find solace is her art class. It feels real to how it feels when you went through something difficult and are in a place where no one is supporting you. There feels like there is nowhere to go.

What’s your favorite book that features mental difference or mental illness?

I know I’m using this book a lot in this tag, but it was just so beautifully written and so relatable to my own experiences and feelings. It’s not just my favorite mental health work, but it’s also one of my all time favorite books in general.

What’s your least favorite book that features mental difference or mental illness?

So this is another book I read that at the time I really enjoyed and didn’t really understand that it was a bad representation of mental illness at the time. Love saving these two characters from their mental health problems is something that even isn’t safe to imply. Looking for someone outside of yourself to save you and cure you from your problems isn’t really going to do anything but put a bandaid on your problems. Sure, love will happen if your mentally struggling or not, but it isn’t going to cure it. Books like this might give readers the wrong impression.

What’s a book that takes you to your happy place? When you are dealing with mental health struggles, what is your happy place?

I have read and reread ‘The Giver’ so many times. I’ve been attached to this book since elementary school and it has been my favorite for years. It makes me think of how important emotion and color is to make our lives beautiful. To inspire our compassion for ourselves and for others. It puts me in a mood of appreciation for life.

Honestly, my happy place and what I need a lot when I’ve been struggling during the week is my time with my boyfriend. Being held by him. Being held by someone that you know loves you and who knows who you are and you hat your going through feels like a weight being lifted. He helps me to feel at peace with myself and to know that everything will be ok. Also his constant jokes always put a smile on my face.

What’s your favorite quote from a book that features mental difference or mental illness? What’s something you want other people to know about mental difference or mental illness?

‘But some people are just starfish–they need everyone to fill the roles that they assign. They need the world to sit around them, pointing at them and validating their feelings. But you can’t spend your life trying to make a starfish happy, because no matter what you do, it will never be enough. They will always find a way to make themselves the center of attention, because it’s the only way they know how to live.’ -Akemi Dawn Bowman (Starfish)

Nothing better describes the selfishness of living with someone who expects you to live and be exactly the way they want you to all the time. If you don’t fit into their box you face their wrath. So many traumas from this abuse caused me to want to people please and to have this deep feeling that I’m going to mess up and hurt someone I love badly. However, I am not broken. There isn’t anything wrong with me and it’ll all be ok. So, that’s what I want everyone to know. Wherever you are and however dark a place you find yourself you will get to a better place and it will all be ok.

Tag your it!

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A Month Without Complaining

I have noticed that I do a fair bit of complaining. That sometimes, I’ll get so upset that that’s all I’ll talk about are things that don’t feel good to me. I want to see if by challenging myself to be more positive and to not being a focus on something discomforting that I’ll be able to more often discuss and focus on the things that do feel good.

I want to see how my life changes if anything at all changes in the next 30 days. Just keeping in mind in each moment to focus on what’s good about a situation. To ease the way I converse with others. I’m curious about how my relationships will change too. If things will become more playful or just feel better in general.

It’ll be an interesting experiment. So from now on to March 20th I will not complain. And if I do a little at least I’ll make a conscious effort to stop and change the way I’m talking about whatever I’m talking about in a more positive way.

I’ll track how my day went over the next 30 days and how things feel. Name the good things. Talk about if I slipped up or if I’m doing particularly well about it. It’ll be a good challenge for my mental health.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

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Sorta My Goals for 2021

What I want for 2021 has very little to do with any sort of thing I want to obtain or do in the tangible accomplishment kind of way. More in a mental change kind of way.

2020 felt like a building up of a lot of things to be fearful and anxious of. I want to instead use that as a reason to turn into myself and panic to start turning outward and enjoy the things I have in my life now. Loving more. Laughing more. All of course in a safe and socially distant manner. Enjoying the games I’ve come to love. Reading more again. Being happier.

I want to be one who celebrates all the good things in my life instead of complaining about what’s bad. Cause falling into despair only causes hurt and 2020 had enough of that.

My goodreads challenge this year is 1 book. I am not putting pressure on myself to do anything in particular. Just to enjoy and love more and decrease my life’s stresses.

Any goals this year I won’t be making right now. Whatever, accomplishments I make will be bonuses. This year I just want to feel like I can breath.

I hope that for all of you, your 2021 is a better year. We all deserve it.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

Places to donate to Trans communities:

Trans Equality 

The Trevor Project

Transgender Law Center 

Some BLM resources: 

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Watching: Bojack Horseman: Season 6

So I watched season 6 a while ago and it’s taken me a while to get around to discussing the masterpiece that is the ending of the show.

From the very opening I was hooked and every episode beautifully lead into one of the most satisfying endings to a tv series I’ve seen in ages.

When I started watching I kept pausing to talk about it with my bf and it was basically me being in awe of how detailed the series is.

Pretty much everything I could say about the beginning I wrote just being super excited in the texts above.

I don’t really know how else to discuss the ending of this series other then saying just each and every episode was masterfully created. Honestly, I’m just going to say right now that nothing I can say about the show will be enough to do it justice so I’m just going to write about some of what I loved and leave you all with the thought to watch the show if you haven’t already. It’s incredible!

In season 6 Bojack becomes an acting professor and finds himself in a place of doing what he loves after being sober and out of rehab. I love this for Bojack. It’s a arc of hope and even though it doesn’t last. Even though the past comes back and Bojack must answer for it, it still was the beautiful and perfect thing that I know Bojack will remember in a good way for the rest of his life.

Holly Hawk goes to a college party and has an panic attack and a boy talks to her and she finds out one of the darkest things Bojack has done. after this her relationship with Bojack strains and she distances herself from him. The person Bojack actually values before himself is the one person who shows that she values herself before him.

In diane’s life she finds happiness with a guy named “Guy”. He encourages her to do what she needs to to get her depression under control. Tells her that it’s ok to write something fun if she wants. I think it’s finally the kind of relationship she deserves.

Then there’s Princess Caroline and just thinking about writing about her brought tears to my eyes. She’s my favorite character and she got the best ending and she deserved it so much. She got a man that’s amazing for her. A child to care for. She runs her own empire and she’s just incredible and after everything she’s been through and how she responded in every moment she so deserved it. She’s a queen. I’m so happy for all she comes to enjoy in season 6.

Mr. peanutbutter becomes the face of depression. His relationship with his girlfriend ends and he finds himself alone for the first time in his life. It’s one thing he never learned how to be and somehow it all oddly fits for him.

Todd finds himself taking care of Princess Caroline’s child and somehow everything he does ends up working out. His friendship with Bojack May never be repaired, but he’s living a happy life of his own and I love that for him.

The second to last episode is Bojack’s fever dream near-death experience. It’s a trip. It’s one of the most hard hitting episodes in the whole series and I felt semi ok only because I knew it wasn’t his death. That whole episode like the rest of Bojack could have a post all it’s own.

Then the ending. This perfect sorta awkward moment of wondering what’s next. There is so so much between these two. Diane spent a lot of time writing about Bojack. There looked like there was so much more they could have said in those last moments and yet really there wasn’t anything left to say. It was time to move on. It’s hard to write about without tears welling up. It was beautiful.

Bojack Horseman is such a beautiful show. I know it’s something I’ll rewatch and always think about as one of the best shows I’ve ever seen. It shows horrible things, but also give a sense of accountability. It’s depressing, but also hopeful. Every piece of it means something. I adore it.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

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Watching Bojack Horseman: Season 4

I watched season 4 of Bojack in a blink of an eye. I’ve become so enamored in the story I’ve been like a kid who can’t wait to see what’s next. And so, very shortly after I’ve written about Season 3 I get to discuss season 4 with all of you… and what a season it was.

The whole first episode took place without Bojack. It felt strange and yet it felt right since he had disappeared himself from everyone else’s lives. Mr. Peanutbutter gets a visit from his ex-wife and she leads him to run for governor. This drives Diane crazy and she tries often to call Bojack and tell him what’s going on and figure out what happened to him, but he doesn’t answer. So for a while she just continues working and deals with her marital issues on her own.

Then Princess Caroline decides she wants to be a mom and so she starts trying for a baby with her boyfriend Ralph. This is one of the first really great relationships for her and while there were things that showed they weren’t quite a match I enjoyed seeing them together. It was sweet to watch and it showed a lot of growth on Caroline’s part. She’s such a strong character. The one I look up to the most on the show.

In season 4 we also get a lot more Todd. I loved that he got his own episode. Princess Caroline asks Todd to help her out by having him be seen dating celebrity Courtney to help give her a more relatable image.

For Todd this season has been about discovering himself. Having him find his identity and starting to be open about it. I loved the ace rep in the show. It was so open and easy and how it should be accepted out in the world. I especially loved Bojack’s reaction. Although his and Todd’s relationship has been particularly hard. Where Todd has felt used and unappreciated and so theirs a lot of distance between the two, Bojack’s reaction to Todd’s identity is super chill. Such a great thing to see.

Todd is shown to have grown quite the backbone this season and starts creating the life that he wants for himself. He doesn’t see Bojack in the best light and takes steps back from their relationship in this season and honestly I don’t blame him. Todd hadn’t been treated the best by Bojack and Todd got tired of feeling like a doormat and as sad as it is he needed distance from him for the betterment of himself.

After the events and pain from the ending of season 3 Bojack finds himself back at his old childhood home. Here he stays inside and does little things to fix up the place after it had been abandoned for so long. However, nothing really gets done right until Eddie the next door neighbor comes and helps Bojack.

This period of time in Bojack has been one of my favorites to watch. Bojack’s relationship with Eddie is one of two people recognizing each other’s hardship and simply working together through that. I love that Eddie has a past that caused him to recognize what Bojack was going through and for him to have the will to be a friend to him anyway.

Yet it doesn’t end well. They finish the building and Bojack brings people to tear it down. We don’t know what happens with Eddie after that. Especially, after his heartbreak from flying to save Bojack after he jumps from the roof of the house. Eddie hadn’t flown in years after his wife’s passing. It’s one of those stories that captures you with both it’s odd reflects of beauty chipped in with the lumps of sadness.

Season 4 shows a lot of Bojack’s past. Particularly his relationship with his mother, but also his mother’s own experiences growing up. Beatrice is a difficult woman to say the least. She destroyed Bojack’s sense of self-worth from the start. She is manipulative and arrogant. Yet seeing her start of life and knowing that she’s know aged and suffering from increased dementia it’s still sad to watch. She’s an example of someone whose experienced trama and turned it into something that makes it ok to her to treat other people like crap. It’s the saddest thing. There is no good excuse to be a terrible person.

Then Bojack meets Hollyhawk a young girl that believes that she is his daughter. It is quite possibly the first really good relationship I’ve seen Bojack have with anyone. Yes he takes off and does his own thing stemming from his depression, but he genuinely cares about her and does everything in his power to find her mother.

What I loved most about Hollyhawk was how much she brought out the compassion in Bojack. Especially towards his mother. She’s a sweetie pie. She listens to Bojack when he says how horrible his mom is and how he’d been treated, but also gets him to see that he should treat her better. I love her. She makes him a better person.

One of the saddest parts of the show is when he finds out that his mother was giving Hollyhawk diet pills to the point that Hollyhawk needed to be rushed to the hospital. This causes him unable to see her anymore and he frantically goes and takes his mother to a nursing home more angry then he’d ever been at her. His mother ruined the one good relationship that he’d had. A relationship he’d not ruined himself and he was rightfully terribly upset.

When he walks away and leaves her there she remembers who she is and instead of telling her off he gives her something beautiful to think about and it is one of the most beautiful scenes I’ve seen of Bojack so far. Makes me tear up even now. He chooses to be kind to the one who’d been so cruel to him. It’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen.

The ending of Season 4 is my favorite. It’s so positive and happy and it made me feel so good inside. Hollyhawk accepts Bojack into her life as her brother and the look on Bojack’s face said it all. It’s one of the most beautiful moments on the show. It made me feel hopeful about Bojack’s future. He’s grown and learned to put someone before himself and healed so much of the past that haunted him. God I loved this season so much.

I’m excited to finally watch Season 5. (I had no real reason to put off writing this other then just not feeling like doing it sadly) However, I’m excited to finally be able to continue watching Bojack’s story. It’s a beautiful one. A sad one, but a wonderful one too.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

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I’m Back Officially

At the moment I feel like the luckiest girl in the world. Everything is working out for me. Things I thought were issues are no longer issues. I’ve essentially been graced with a brand new beginning and I’m mentally in a very good place and I’m excited to move forward.

This means I’m going to be posting every day again. Yep, I’m back in full. This both feels long overdue, but also at the same time I’m coming back to things just at the time I need to. It’s just been time for me. Time for me to be myself, but the me that I’ve become and not just who I’ve always been.

I can’t believe that I’m standing here from where I once was. Someone that felt so lost so confused so hopeless. I built myself up again and suddenly everything fell back into place. I feel like I’ve been on a hell of a ride well for my whole life really. Now things will show up and I feel so much better because I know I can deal. I know I can make it through.

Being where I am now I know I can handle being productive again. I know I can create without worrying anymore. I know I have people in my life I can count on. I know that I’m going to be ok. That everything is going to turn out beautiful. It’s been so long since I’ve felt that way. Truly felt that way. Especially now that I have so much more knowing of what was then I ever have before.

I’m so appreciative of all of you that have been following this blog. Truly, so much of my life would be different without it. It’s changed my life. Been my strength when I needed it. My outlet when I didn’t know where to go or what else to do. It’s about time I’m truly back. I have so much that I want to create with this blog. I can’t wait to continue moving forward with it.

Thank you all so much for staying with me. I have so much more life to live and I can’t wait to share my journey with all of you. It’s gonna be a good one. I feel it in my bones.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

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Watching: Bojack Horseman Season 3

Season 3 of Bojack Horseman was a whirlwind. It has my favorite episode of Bojack so far, a look on some more background of Bojack and the gang, and some of the darkest most intense moments of the series so far. This is the season where I have found that I am completely in love with this show and I can’t wait to talk about why.

First of all, I want to talk about my favorite episode.

Episode 4: Fish out of water

This episode is an art piece. The sound of it. The way that everything is visual. How it’s basically silent storytelling. It’s gorgeous. It’s also one of the happiest episodes of Bojack. As a seahorse gives birth and Bojack ends up taking care of the little one and taking him back to his home.

I loved it so much I even drew my favorite moment:

I made a bit of a mess of the proportions, but I’m still happy with the result. It was a fun thing to draw. This is the happiest I had ever seen Bojack and Bojack has done so many things that have been sketchy in his life, but seeing him happy is the way I wish I could always see him.

A big part of season 3 was showing the past. The time after Bojack was a star on Horsin’ around and when he stared on a new tv series “The BoJack Horseman Show”. A show that was said to be terrible. In these episodes of Bojack Horseman we see younger versions of everyone and get a sense of how they’ve grown and developed to the people they are later on. Mr. peanutbutter in a bad marriage, Princess Caroline not yet an agent and barely developing her on again off again relationship with Bojack, Todd being young and discovering who he is, Diane working in a coffee shop just starting to write on the side. It’s so cool to see that part of these characters I have come to love. Gives each of them an even deeper characterization and all of them feel even more like people.

A big aspect of season 3 is Diane gets pregnant. Diane does not want a child and so she decides to have an abortion and being the social media coordinator for Sextina Aquafina she accidentally tweets about it and Sextina becomes a face of the pro-choice movement. It’s a unique perspective because I feel like Diane learns a lot about herself through this time and what it means to her to be a feminist. She gets confronted by her own biases and understands that the way she had been viewing Sextina was in a way that didn’t value her for who she truly was. It was a fascinating part of season 3 for me.

Another thing that happens is Todd meets up with his old friend Emily and they make a business together. Emily likes Todd, but we find out that Todd is asexual and just having that shown in a show like this was really cool. Todd ends up carrying on the business with Mr. Peanutbutter and it becomes the opposite of what it was meant to be originally and even though for me it turned into something I didn’t care for it ended up being a good thing later on.

A big part of season 3 is Bojack creating a campaign in hopes of being an Oscar winner. He and his friends go into meetings and set up places for him to show to create a new image for him to get picked. A lot of it goes great and a lot of it doesn’t, but that’s sorta how everything always goes for Bojack.

Bojack develops an interesting relationship with his publicist Ana. She thinks she can win him an Oscar for his role in secretariat and it ends up not happening and so she leaves him. This starts the unraveling that later turns into the most heartbreaking series of events in Bojack so far.

After years of Princess Caroline being Bojack’s agent he fires her for good. At that point he had all his hopes in Ana and Caroline had seemingly ruined two new opportunities for him and he felt fed up. It really wasn’t her fault, but it didn’t matter. Thus, began the beginning of the end.

Bojack gets announces as an Oscar nominee and so he throws a party. He gets majorly drunk and when he tries to kill himself by driving his car into his pool. He then gets saved by Mr. Peanutbutter only to be told that his nomination was a mistake. Then, Bojack has a convo with Todd that is the most intensely sad convo I’ve heard in all the series. Where Todd tells him that he’s the problem. The reason he is the way is is because of himself and no one else and it’s both so cruel and so hard-hitting. Bojack then goes on the deep end.

Then we get to the saddest part of the show. After months of sobriety Sabrina goes on a bender with Bojack and it’s terrible and heartbreaking to watch. Showing such darkness and pain in a tv show like this hit me hard. Both of them become lost.

And then as sometimes happens after taking too many drugs Sabrina dies and Bojack realizes her loss was his fault. The body isn’t meant take that much poison. Then the art of it, the way that they portray her death is haunting and beautiful. Yet not at all glorifying the moment in anyway. It felt like a knife in the gut to watch.

At the very end, Bojack tries to kill himself once more and ends up watching a group of wild horses just running and it stops him. Then the season ends on a moment of hope. It’s such a dark season and yet beautiful in its way. The writers and artists create a both real, bleak, and yet hopeful picture of what living life is. It’s glorious. It’s a show well worth applauding.

On the heels of my favorite season so far I’m excited to continue on the series and see what more Bojack has in store for me. I’m now halfway through his journey and so far I’ve loved each and every moment. Can’t wait for what is next.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Sisters of Twilight website.

Watching Bojack Horseman: Season 2

I have to start off by saying this show is great. As my person would say it has some of the best showing of what it is to have depression on television. Season 2 of Bojack Horseman was fantastic to watch.

This season reached some great highs and some heartbreaking lows. Happiness is an inside job and Bojack struggles to find it and does in spurts, but never for long. That’s how depression goes sometimes. Sometimes it’s hard to change a mindset that you’ve held on to for years.

The very first episode was the hardest for me to watch.

Nothing gets to me like sucky parents and the closest I’ve gotten to crying because of this show has been seeing how awful Bojack’s parents were to him. Made him feel like his existence was inherently wrong and bad and it’s no wonder he’s grown up not truly being able to find happiness, because he’d never found a good way of healing all that pain. He gave himself to alcohol and bad decisions. He’s found great success in life, but still feels like nothing will ever be good enough. It can’t be not when he can’t find the good in himself.

Bojack finally lands his dream role of Secretariat. Yet at first his want to change his attitude makes him not as suitable for the role. All along Bojack had a lot of similarity to Secretariat’s essence even if that really is a sad truth. Yet even when he’d preform at the core of who Secretariat would be, they decided to make a completely different movie, all the grit removed. Hell they didn’t even use a single bit of Bojack’s acting in the final movie, just a cgi version of him.

Yet, somehow this very different movie that has nothing to really do with Secretariat turns out ok. Yet, it says nothing of Bojack or Secretariat and I don’t really know if I’d be ok with that if I were in Bojack’s shoes.

Another huge part of season 2 of bojack is JD Salinger’s show having Mr. Peanutbutter hosting. Bojack becomes a celebrity on the first episode and shit hits the fan. It becomes about humiliating Bojack until Princess Caroline tells Bojack about Mr. Peanutbutter’s tell. That episode is one of my favorites. It gets into so many difficult topics and realities of human reaction. Bojack gets petty and makes some sucky decisions and it is what it is.

Not to mention that Bojack’s girlfriend Wanda is a very important part of season 2. She makes Bojack happy for a while, but with his focus often elsewhere it isn’t enough and his depression wins out. Wanda is a positive being. She lifts Bojack up, but Bojack doesn’t want to be lifted not really. He may have loved her for a while, but in the end he breaks her heart and instead of chasing after her he chases his past and again only finds a temporary kind of happiness.

One of the most interesting things to watch was the dynamic between Bojack and Diane. Diane was supposed to go off to Cordovia for 6 months and she does, but then she realizes that Sebastian St. Clair is full of shit and she really isn’t doing anything to help anyone so she heads home. Yet, instead of going home she stays at Bojack’s house and lies to her husband for months that she’s still in Cordovia. Yet all the while she lays around drinking with Bojack and he lets her stay there.

This of course creates tension between himself and Wanda. Wanda certainly doesn’t want her boyfriend sitting on his ass wasting away with someone he’d had love for, for hours on end. It’s then she realizes she never really knew Bojack and everything between them falls apart.

Yet I have to say my favorite high of the show was for Princess Caroline. She enters a relationship with Rutabaga and they want to have a company together. Since Rutabaga puts the company in her name when things go bad for the two of them when Rutabaga shows he’s playing around and doesn’t truly respect Caroline she gives him the finger and keeps the company for herself. I have mad respect for Caroline. She’s amazing. Love seeing such a strong feminine feline in this show.

On a whole, season 2 was amazing to watch. It had great funny moments. It showed some real friendship. It had some wonderful jokes. Some real lows. A lot of difficult subjects to delve into. It’s a masterpiece. Every single character is three dimensional and real. You care for everyone no matter how flawed. People don’t always chose the “right” thing and this show gets that and isn’t afraid to show things for what they are.

There is so much detail that goes into the art and you can screenshot any point and you could see just how much was going on. It’s so good at showing hard truths. Yet it isn’t a hopeless show. Bojack wants to be better and it shows him working on himself, but finding his inner happiness and strength seems like it may be a long battle.

One of my favorite conversations was him talking to Mr. Peanutbutter:

Mr. Peanutbutter has something that Bojack doesn’t, a feeling of self-worth and the confidence that goes with that. Nothing seems good to Bojack because he hasn’t found that yet. It’s such a powerful conversation in the show. It was incredibly well done.

I’m excited to continue on and watch season three. It’s going to be incredible. Bojack’s journey is a hard one and I want to watch it to the very end.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

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Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Sisters of Twilight website.

Watching Bojack Horseman: Season 1

This show is one of those shows that you watch and it changes you. It’s so real. Hits so hard with what actually happens in real life yet with such absurd imagery that you can’t call watching it any sort of form of escapism. If your watching this show your facing some hard truths. That’s all I can say.

Bojack started his career on a show called Horsin’ Around. One of those adorable family tv series we’ve all grown up watching. After that Bojack lost his way. He hasn’t done much since then and he fills up his emptiness by keeping around him a few people that he cares about.

For one princess caroline his agent. She is his on again off again girlfriend, but most of all she’s always there and does what she can to further his career.

There’s Todd, Bojack’s roommate and closest friend. Bojack tries to keep him a bit codependent which isn’t healthy, but the show really isn’t about showing what a healthy relationship looks like.

Then there is Diane, the girl Bojack loves. She’s in a relationship with a guy he really doesn’t care for Mr. Peanutbutter. Yet, they spend a lot of time together because she becomes the ghostwriter to write about Bojack’s life.

A part of the show is where Bojack is trying to get Mr. Peanutbutter and Diane to break up. Instead his antics end up pushing them further together.

But, the show is about Bojack. The life he’s created for himself and his inner struggle with being a man who isn’t happy and isn’t who he wants to be. He is a portrait of depression. What it does and the actions we take as humans when we are doing are best to take steps away from it. But, also the steps we take under its influence.

One thing I do have to say though is that while living with depression it is all of that. It colors everything in a way that isn’t what it really is. Who Bojack has become because of his depression isn’t all he could be. Yet sometimes, when your stuck and that’s all you see you can’t step away from it enough to acknowledge that. Then the problem perpetuates.

This show is brilliant. Incredibly well styled. Dark in great ways. Yet, it shows that bit of hope that Bojack carries with him. I’m excited to watch the next season and see where the story goes. It is quite the story.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter

Check out the Sisters of Twilight website.

Growing Into A New Mentality

I think that after a year of much spiritual and mental growth it’s time for a new era. An era of happy. I’m ready to be happy. To do me and live my life as free as I can.

This year has started off better then I could’ve imagined. I have so much to be joyful about and so much I just want to enjoy. Knowing I have all the time in the world to enjoy it is wonderful.

I’ve let go of so much. I’m learning to create a new story. I’m learning to give up old patterns and I’ve seen today that I’m still on the way to it. Which is ok. I’m fine with being on my way to everything that I desire. I know that’s how it will be all my life. I’m enjoying now immensely and that’s all that really matters.

I’m still growing into this mentality. Still learning to not push back so much. Learning to be me irregardless of who others are. I’m getting better and better at it everyday. I’m learning that holding on to anything negative at all solves no problems and that letting them go and creating positivity leads to more and more positivity.

I know that growing into this mentality will have some push back from others. Mostly because I’m coming to believe that everything will really be ok. “Reality” as many will want to point out can be sucky, but I wanna focus on the good parts. I know that I’ve done so much of focusing on the negative for way too long.

These past few days in general have been particularly wonderful. I want to focus on that. I want to focus on good times with friends. Wonderful conversations. Knowing that we’re all growing together. I’ve felt really peaceful these past few days. Really calm. Full of knowing. I feel so much clarity.

That’s all of what 2020 will be for me. Happy, full of love, hope for the future, and lots of good times. I can’t believe how good the year has started. I can’t wait to see all the rest that’s in store.

I know things are getting better and better. I’m going to enjoy this life of mine. It’s going to be beautiful.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING! Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below! 

Check out my Instagram and Twitter

Check out The Book Raven Poetry website

Checkout The Book Raven Poetry Instagramand Twitter